Samstag, 31. Dezember 2011

This is NOT a year review!

Today was a bright and sunny day, a beautiful Saturday, although my hopes for snow were not fulfilled.
Now the sun is setting and it will be the last sunset of 2011. There are only a few hours of this year left.
To me, New Year's Eve is not just a special day, to me it's magical: The old year has not quite passed and the  new one has not arrived yet. I love this time, I love the feeling of floating between yesterday and tomorrow and I love the feeling that everything can happen, because after all, tomorrow is not only a new morning, it is a new year, and if that's not the time to change something, what is it?

Since today is the 31st December it would be about time to write a 2011 review like the ones I have seen on loads of other blogs (o's here is an especially beautiful example), but I can't do that. Strangely the end of this year doesn't feel like an ending at all for me; it feels as if it was only the beginning. At the moment I am experiencing an indescribably happy period of my live, I have finally found a balance between interacting with other people and keeping to myself which may not sound like a big thing, but it is, it really is. Not being able to control my feelings is something that has nearly destroyed me in the past.
Perhaps that is the reason New Year's Eve doesn't seem like an ending to me, 2012 is the first year in ages I am actually looking forward to again.

And I owe a big part of my confidence for the future to you. One of the reasons I cannot await midnight is that my first real year as a book blogger is about to start, I am looking forward to beginning with my challenges, discovering new books and meeting new fantastic people.

Having a blog has turned my life into an adventure, and I am not exaggerating. I feel like I have finally found my people and updating Literary Stars as well as reading posts on other blogs has become one of my favourite parts of the day.

Also, I am really proud of myself, if I may say so. I wrote my first post ever on November 20 and I had no idea what I was doing. Computers never used to interest me much and I have to admit that I was really helpless in the beginning, I remember having a huge freak out when I tried for hours and hours to change my layout and it just didn't seem to lead anywhere. But I did not want any help, which was probably stupid because my older sister is a genius with computers and could have saved me many tears.
Anyway, all that you see on this blog has been created and collected by me, its flaws are my fault and its merits too. So if I have achieved nothing else in 2011, I have discovered book blogging and I am glad for that.

This would be the place to write down my New Years Resolutions now, but for the first time in such a long time I don't have any. I mean, of course I want to attract some more readers next year, I want to read all the books I have listed for my challenges, do my Spanish homeworks more regularly and losing a few pounds would not be bad either, but at the moment there is nothing in my life which really has to be changed.
And if I think about last year, when my resolution was not to jump in front of a train, or the year before when it was not to hurt myself anymore, I am content. (I hope I am not scaring anyone here, no more getting emotional when this is over, I  promise!)

So in my opinion 2012 shall come! For the first time in such a long time I know I'll be okay.
Happy New Year!


  1. I'm so glad to hear that you've found your balance and that book blogging is already coming to mean so much you. I'm sometimes amazed at how something so simple as sharing my love of books with others can be so meaningful, but it is.

    Here's wishing you a blessed New Year and wonderful reading for 2012.

  2. I haven't opened a book blog yet, due to lack of time. However, after consistantly having been laughed at for reading books, I love reading book blogs, written by people, who obviously love reading just as I do.
    You say "I know I'll be okay." I think, it is a beautiful thought.
    Have a lovely New Year.